Sunday, September 11, 2016

There is no turning back for me now...

These past few days, I was preoccupied with whether or not I should take up the offer for Front Office, in the role for MA. So the role is like a RM's PA, where you have to help the RM with clients account opening as well as the other admin work like placing of orders and etc. Had an interview with one of the two RMs that I will have to service, and she gave me a clearer picture of the MA role. It is pretty ironic. I had always wanted to escape back office thru the front office, but when I had  finally have a chance to do so, I hesitated and considered the implications of it. I think I more or less internally came to a conclusion but often wondered if it is the right way to go by it. Maybe I downplayed an MA prospects but I guess, if I have no intention of being an RM, it is not a good idea to go to a MA role and banking on the hope that I will be able to head on towards the Investment Counsellors and Investment Services direction. Its like Tracey the RM who interviewed me, she would not have known another MA if its like another part of the office. So, unless I am lucky or try to mingle around and expand my networking , then I will have a shot at it. I mean the pay is good and she can match whatever I am asking as well as the bonus easily. However, it is always the uncertainty that the skills set is not good enough nor is it niche enough to be elsewhere, should one day I quit the MA role. Of course, my personal pride and belief that I can do well and thrive in that role also was tempting me. It felt like pretty much my secondary school days where I forgo Biology for Principles of Accounts. Though in the end, I also did not do well enough for PoA during O levels. Who knows, I might have over thought on that but I was sure that I would like Biology, so least i went by the route that I wanted.

Another time was when I was considering SIM-UOL or engineering degree from NTU. Eventually, my interest won me over. I guess any one can study anything as long as they put their mind to it. But, without the interest, it would be a whole lot of unhappiness and dread. Learning should be something that one enjoys.

The other path that was opened to me since I was thinking of rejecting the MA role, was to restart my CFA. Apparently, a career personality test which I took online recommended me for the Financial Analyst role. And it kind of struck me that after 3 years since I started, somehow life went a whole round and tell me that's the direction I should be heading to. And unlike last time, there is no turning back for me. There will not be any FO position for me once I rejected this role, and my time in operations is a dead end, there is no turning back. I have to passed the level 1 and start looking for opportunities in that direction le. I do not have a back up plan, there is no such thing as reversing back to settlements since I detested it. If I fail in this attempt, I will most probably be stuck in operations or I have to re-take again. But I do not think there will be any opportunities in FO anymore as I would have spent too long in operations already. There is just no turning back.

I just sent the reject message to the RM, so now there is no turning back le. There is only 1 way to go and that's to pass my CFA Level 1 and to look for a more analytical jobs that is in other banks. I have no idea what sort of teams are found in other banks, but I just have to force my way in that direction, This will be the battle in my career from now on, to force my way in that direction. There is no turning back. Swim or drown, This will be one of my many legacies I will leave in this world when I leave this planet. Like the swordsman, who live and die by his sword. I am answerable to the choice that I chose.