Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Mind Blast

Sitting on the bus today, as the sky rolls by and then the habitual action of picking up the phone to play Pokémon Go starts again. It actually got me thinking. Is there a need to spin those poke stops? Is there a need to rush to catch these Pokémon? What is the objective of this game? A higher CP? A rarer Pokémon? And due to the consistent reading of self-help books on dreams and all, the common phrase stands out.

“Is this worth your time at all? Isn’t there any other things you could be better off doing?”

Staring out of the window, and appreciating the fact that nature is beautiful no matter where we are. The skies will be the same out for at least a couple of miles; the stars have always been there. Being grateful for the fact that nature is still beautiful and all around us.
Thought of Joseph Schooling, the story and his triumph. And the quote “Be Like Schooling” came to mind. The desire to win, to succeed and the chance to duel with his childhood idol. His dreams. My dreams. What am I doing for my dreams? What are my dreams?

“I wanna be the very best. Like no one ever was”

Due to the habitual catching of Pokémon, the above quote popped out in my head. There were some smaller goals that popped in my mind recently. It’s like reduce weight until 74kg. Be a more successful investor. Change of job. At the end of the day, I feel that I keep going back to these thoughts. Have I psycho myself so much that I keep thinking of these only? Or is these what I really want for my dreams? Another way of thought is that these are the steps that I need to take to achieve these dreams.

“I have no idea what I was supposed to do during my 20s. I only got a clearer picture after 30 and after setting up Alibaba”~~ Jack Ma

Happened to watch a short part of a Jack Ma’s interview, and this phrase which he said, stood out for me. I guess most people do not have a very clear idea what they should do, or what are their dreams ah. Don’t get me wrong, I have known friends and other humans who have known what they want. However, for people like me, I would guess I do not really have a clue. My goals just kind of change every time. At 21, I wanted to graduate with 1st class honors. I got a 2nd Upper instead at 25 years old. At 25, I very much want to enter to a Bank. Went thru 15 interviews and landed up in BNP WM Back office. After that, I don’t really have much else to fight for already. Drawing a basic salary of 2.6k take home and all, going for an annual trip overseas, saving for wedding and house in life.  I pretty much thought I will be a much improved investor but I think still quite far away.

“What you think is what you get”

So, after reading tons of positive thinking books like SECRET and all, this phrase kept popping in my mind. So it goes that what ones think during the day, it shall be brought to life from the Universe. If you keep thinking negatively, your life in the future will be negative too. It’s all about how one’s maintain the positive-ness and yet do something to make it happen. 

“Just Do It”

Which brings me to this famous quote under NIKE? Just do it, don’t think. I guess I have been pretty much plagued by this for most of my life on this planet. As I will ask about the end goal, and always contests whether is it worth it or not.  Think a lot, but never actually do it. I guess Army kind of took that worrying part of me away, cuz I don’t really have a say anyways. It’s just do it, and that’s why I can achieve an IPPT-Silver in my life. That’s when I lost the most weight. In a way, I managed to get over Samantha pretty much by then. If I take it a step further, most of my significant achievements are those that I just dug deep and pretty much keep working at it. Don’t have the time to worry whether it’s the right thing to do or not? Don’t have to think whether this is worth my time or not? Just do it.

Tuesday, August 09, 2016

After 48 hours

After the argument I had with a senior HK MA on monday, for some reason, I had not been a peace with myself. Initially, I had thought that it most probably the ego that was bruised or smthg. Otw back, decided to stop at the industrial park and walk back. Manage to catch a pidgey thats all, thought I will be able to sort my thoughts through after the 15 min walk. However, my mind was not clouded with the incident, but rather more disturbed. I wanted to think about it, but it seems that my mind is blank and stagnant. Eventually, fought a nearby Gym and help establish it a bit before heading home. Went home and had dinner, then found out that my gym had been over threw by another gym which has pretty high CP pokemons. I felt an initial disgust and anger towards the incident.Still wondering whether my ego is still bruised. At night,decided to play MH with Ernest, GK and his sister. Still felt not at peace.

This morning thought of doing a pokewalk from my house to serangoon. Thought that the walk might clear my head. Well it did divert my attention from the niggling sense of negativity thoughts. However, it has not exactly brought the peace that I am after. Was it that because I am tired ?  As i slept at 2am the previous night and than I am out at 7.40am in the morning ?

After 48 hours , the conclusion? I think I need to sleep. k.thks.nitez