Sunday, February 24, 2013

Really not easy

After hearing cat story about her own r/s and her own issues, I can totally empathise her feelings and all. Because I think that for mine and hers , we are pretty much the same. I guess deep down, we both knew that should we give up, our r/s will be over. We both knew our partners are not the kind who are proactive and that to put it bluntly, they are not the kind who will think about us or put us first in their lives. For them, other things are of more important priorities. However, I feel that we 2 are neither quitters, we still hold on to that hope or something that one day, things will improve or somewhat. It sounds unhealthy I know, but isn't that what most r/s are about? From a 3rd party pov, it will always be unhealthy, but for the players there is a side that we had seen and maybe thats our motivational power.

On my part, I think I need to sit her down and talk to her. I did talk to her last thursday, but I am not sure she gets the gist. Because like sam, she will give no response whenever I so call talk serious things with her. She will just keep quiet and I have basically no idea what she is thinking of feeling, is she angry? is she guilty? and things like that. I still love her, I know I still do but now I am having that feeling of unloved. The feeling that why am I doing all this? It feels that I am doing all the work. It always takes 2 to clap, not one... Like my emotional love tank is near empty...

No comments: