Anchors

Recently was reading on Adam Khoo's book. The book taught about how our minds work in some ways. One of them is how we like to anchor our feelings/emotions to certain thoughts,objects and even people around us. For an example like when you see someone, then you will have certain thoughts about that someone.

In my case, I think that I had attached certain emotions on to muddy. I know that somehow my chances with her is nearing zero already, and I had somewhat had resigned to that fate. Cuz maybe I am exhausted? or I just felt "thats enough". However, everytime I see her name on my phone, or if anything that's related to her. A whole lot of feelings will come attached with it. Like old emotions like lack of reciprocation, loneliness, resentment, hope and a certain amount of self denial. Was suppose to meet up this saturday evening, but she had to call it off cuz she have her previous cca chalet. Well, and definitely some resentment came out because it always seems to be the case. But, anws in any case, it really sucks to anticipate for something only for it to be cancel or whatsoever, thats probably one of the reasons why if I agree to something, I will always try to make it, unless something really bad happens.

Also, there are other anchors that I had sub-consciously placed on muddy. Like how only she is the ideal girl for me and how well we complement each other and stuff. Its really fascinating how our sub-conscious can fool even ourselves. I think this is what generally what people meant when " the heart and mind dont think alike", and it causes disequilibrium. I have to agree that I cannot find anyone else currently suited to me, but then again it could be my mind playing up certain characteristics of her so that I thought that she is the one. However, feelings-wise, I don't really get any vibes from her and stuff. I think its time that I just accept the fact that we are just really friends and that's all to it. And learn how to treat her like her I treat my other female friends. Whether eventually she is the one a not, I don't think there is a need to even consider it because the thought will definitely lead me on. Just like an addiction. 

Regarding on anchors, I think thats why sometimes when we are with a group of friends, we are generally talkative but with another, we are as quiet as students in an examination. Maybe, its due to the different anchors that we attach to our friends that we react differently to different groups. And if thats really the case, are we able to re-configure ourselves so that we can always show the true sides of ourselves to our friends. But, on hindsight, in various social relationships we have with others, we all play different roles in our various relationships. In some relationships, we may be the main focal point. In others, we may be the supporting cast.
So, on anchors, I feel that if we are able to change on some negative anchors like in my case, maybe things might be better?