H.S.B.I.A

Ok before I start anything on this, I want to say is that this is not me emo-ing ah...its just something that I had found along the way...haha..Actually it's based on my past and a bit from the movies...please take it with a pinch of salt, for it might not applies to everyone out there. This is actually a pattern that I realise recently when one falls into a one-sided relationship or a relationship that fails....Oh and it's from a guy's perspective..like duh...lol

H=Happiness

This portion is the shortest in the entire process but the one that prolongs the pain as well as the only one that make someone hold on to the relationship as well.This is also the portion where it seems that both of you are made for each other, where everything in your world is only her.Everyday, you will only talk about her, think about her...waiting for the next outing with her and stuff like this. And your world is filled with colours, its a very beautiful time of your life.

S=Sadness

Then when the inevitable happens, the both of you are separated or not so close anymore. One becomes very sad, he still tries to convince himself that at least he can remain friends...actually he still hopes for a reconciliation. This is also the point of time, when the heart is feeling damn heart-wrenching...as if life is being taken out of oneself. Everyday, one will try to live life, try to move forward but in actual fact he is forever stuck there. He will waste everyday going through everything in his head, asking and trying to find where is the problem. He wants to see her...but is impossible. And the memories kept replaying,replaying,replaying and replaying over again. He cares not for his health, he just want her back...

B=Bitterness

After the long and constant replaying of memories in the guy's head, there are answers that need answering but often than not, the girl never turns up to answer that. It could be due to a lot of reasons that the guy at that point of time didn't know. No one explain to him, why it happens and stuff. Worse, the girl suddenly disappear entirely from the face of the earth. No return of sms, no return of calls...totally nothing. Then the guy, will feel like shit. Why on earth, doesn't she replys? Why are u doing this? Why are u torturing me? Can u stop avoiding me?..its just kept replaying and replaying..until it comes to a point where everything turns to bitterness. When one starts to hate the girl so much and yet he still loves her, and folks this is the most torturing thing in life. To love and hate someone is truly a painful thing and some might not be able to handle it and drove them mad and stuff. This is also the period, where people will tend to act irrationally only to regret later and pass on their unhappiness onto others.

I=Indifference

The guy will stand up one day, after the long periods of grieving and mourning...he can't be bothered by all of this already and will try to take his mind off such thoughts. He will turn to various ways of 'happiness' , like going back to chasing their dreams or take up a new hobby. This stage, it varies from individuals when they will reach here, some may be lucky and reach here fast...others may forever stuck in the B-sector and never climb out of it. Here, he will not want to have anything to do with the girl anymore and just want to get along with life. Most of the time, the guy will also say things like' I totally dont believe in love and relationships anymore' and all those kind of stuff. It can be seen that he doesn't want a repeat of another time of this.

A=Acceptance

This is the final stage. The day when the light at the end of the tunnel is not a train coming at you. This is when all the questions had been answered, or maybe he felt that its not worth knowing already. Its when somehow he learnt to let go, and that truly wish the other person well. There will definitely be some form of awkwardness as well as there might be still some heart-tugging emotions still there, but he is much more at peace with himself. He is able to move on and to look at the world with hopeful eyes again.

This are so far a process that I had realised and I think that people have to undergo this at least once in their lifetime. Somehow, this will always force them to grow and all, however its not the least easy. Its painful, time-consuming and energy sapping. There is also no fixed time period for this, it varies for different relationships.