After chatting with Sam. and hearing her stories, I began to understand a lot of things on which things are important in life and how narrow-minded I was in the past...Looking back, i dunno why i subjected myself to all the torture and sadness and fear in my mind... where there are people out there with much more pain and sufferings...I also began to understand that I have been so clouded by my feelings that I couldnt even see what was important in my life at this moment and how I should react to the situation that i am in now...
Whenever she will talk about her 'counsel' stories, I often wonder how she cope with the tremendous amount of pressure of someone's else problems and her own set of problems in her life... also and the fact that she is able to bring someone from the darkest places back to Light was even more applauding...sort of made me feel small and rather stupid...coz here is someone whom have seen so many things and weather so many storms in life, and my problems is so small, insignificant compared to hers...
I also began to understood her view and outlook of life, her mindset of touching others lives was too me...its like unreachable coz there is so much you can help in life...to me i always look at my best interests 1st before others, that was something I had pick up along the way in life...however come to think of it...this is what everyone's mentality towards the society nowadays...its a dog-eat-dog world out there...
However, due to me growing up, I sort of forgot the most fundamentals values and ideas that was rather a big part of me when I was deciding how I should be when I get older....to be helpful, to be open, to embrace everyone, to remain young at heart but at the same time be alert in life and know where my priorities lie....in the past i was so worry whether i will even get a GF coz everyone it seems is having...it almost cost me to lose a friend..and I hope not to do such thing ever again...That day, I was doing a compre. on choices and felt that what seperates us from animals is our ability to surpress our instincts and do what we thought is the best thing at that the point of time...so i always have a choice to be how i want to be...whether i want to study, or get caught up in other distractions...
Also, it suddenly dawn on me that the buddhist philosophy" Cause and Effect " have a very strong impact on life and how it operates...What we do in the past, present will determine our choices in the future...when i didnt work hard in PSLE, i got into SGSS, and now in CJC...though i dun even want to be at CJ in the past...had i work harder in P6..maybe i might find myself in NJC...goodness knows....On the other hand, I might not have got to know all my wonderful SGSS friends and many others at CJC too...so in the end how my life turns out was all based on such decisions in the past...and wadever I am doing right now....yes even when I am now typing at this very instant...
So today is the eve of mother's day, though i dun think that i have study much but I now understand some of life's lessons today...I know myself that I may changed in the future...and that wadever i feel now may not hold true in the future...However, hopefully I am able to at least keep the most basic values and fundamentals in my soul that i have now...Whoa...that was some long essay isnt?? LOL....
The path is so much clearer now once the fog have clear....is it the same for u???
No comments:
Post a Comment