Renaissance

Today is another special day again...HAHA cuz its my birthday yet again!!!! Hoho...one year has passed again liao..Decide to take some time off to blog a bit today=P...So far so good, had a sashimi lunch, had chocolates, now with a cup of A&W by my side and inkigayo on tv right now. Life's been good...lolz...Realise that a year before, I didn't even blog on my birthday....I must be really stress to the max sia...leading to a breakdown eventually..haha...On the contrary, this year is anything but that...I even going to leave a module out of my scope as well to focus on the rest...its a gamble and can affect my strategy for next year. But, I think its a strategy that somehow makes me feel intuitively better or should I say at peace. Its a bit worrying that I am not so stressed out, see how humans are fan jian, stress also bad, no stress also bad...lolz.

Actually to tell you the truth, I also don't really know will this be a good thing as well..I currently have a view that no matter what, somehow my life will turn out well. Don't ask me why, I also have no clue.But, having said that, I think I have been more consistent lately than compared to the past. Thats what  I am trying to be, to be consistent in the things I do. I don't really know what my results will be, neither do I know whether whatever I am feeling now is good or whatever I am doing now will turn out for the better. Having 23 years of experience tells me that I really cannot predict the future. But I know that whatever I do in the present will have an effect on the future. And the only time period that I can control, well simply its the present. Whether how far my future will varies from the expected mean, will depends very much on my consistency lo.

Like all birthdays, don't know since when, I always like to think back about the past years. Anws, I realise that I like to refer to the 07/09 years as the "Dark Ages". I think I will use a new word to describe it. The word is "Renaissance". As most of you would know, the Renaissance was an age in France that sparks off a revolution in terms of the arts and technology of that era. To the people then, the earlier stages are pretty dark because such thinking seems to be unorthodox and the church even tried to use ways to purge such acts. So people like Da-vici and Michelangelo has to hide their works. Its in some ways pretty similar during my own personal experiences then. I had always said that I changed a lot, not because of any ill intents. But, rather I want to prove that I can be a better person than before as the spectre chose another person but me. I also want to in some ways harden myself so that I won't be easily beaten down by uncontrollable emotions again. So, I went through a lot of tunings, like tinkering with new ideas and new mindsets. At times, it lead to bad situations but I'm glad that I managed to resolved many of the bad situations that I inadvertently created. Hence, in some ways, its like the Renaissance, its been a revolutionary period of time for me. And similarly this year, I think its gonna be another revolution that I am trying to undertake this year as well. So, maybe 2012 rather than a year where it all ends, it may very well be a year when we shall see the new beginnings of human age, the start of things new.=)

The mountains and rivers have seen many humans and animals come and go, yet they themselves are still there. To them, what's time, when they had already live to million of years that flows by. Whats time to them. To us, pure mortals, time is of an essence. Yet, we mortals still spend time on mopping and stuck in inescapable matrices. Humans cannot escape the emotions that are there, its a fact of life, and its not a bad thing as well=). All we can do is to make use of whatever time we had left.=D